The BFI MacGuffin short scriptwriting competition.

The BFI MacGuffin short scriptwriting competition is a screenwriting competition for 18 - 25 year olds. The brief is to write a action packed, tense thriller in just two pages. The winner will receive a Hitchcock goody bag and a free ticket to the London Screenwriter's Festival.

Here's my submission!



Danielle Louise Johns


LAURA, 15, lies awkwardly in the hallway of a rural cottage.

She wears school uniform and black daps. She slowly wakes up, dazed and in pain. She is bruised and bloody. She sits up and looks around the unfamiliar hallway.
She sees a note stuck to the front door. She slowly stands up and looks at the note. In a manly scrawl it reads; "If I can’t have you, nobody can."

Fear washes over her. She opens the front door to make an escape.


Surrounding the cottage is greenery and trees, but no other houses. It is too quiet.

A middle aged, unattractive man stands in the front garden.
He wears all black and has scratches on his face. In one hand he carries a large container of petrol. Several empty containers litter the garden.

We could’ve have been together
Laura. We could’ve ran away. From
school, from your parents and my
wife... from everything.

 Laura takes a step forward, through the door. Richard is startled.

Get back! Get back in the house!
Laura steps back, tears rolling down her cheeks. Richard drops the petrol can and takes a bottle and a rag from his back pocket. He stuffs the rag in the bottle. He takes a lighter from his trouser pocket and lights the rag.
No! Don’t! No!

Before Laura can take another step, he hurls the bottle at the doorway. She falls backwards into the house and the doorway is engulfed in flames.


Laura scrambles up and runs to the back door. We hear glass breaking as another bottle bomb is thrown through the living room window.


Laura runs into the kitchen. We hear splashes as her daps hit the wet tiles. She tries to open the back door but it’s locked. She shakes it violently with all her weight. It’s no use. She looks around for another option, then realises the floor is sodden. An empty petrol can lies on the floor. She runs out of the kitchen.


Laura flees from the kitchen and into the hallway. The doorway and living room are on fire. She runs upstairs. She leaves wet foot prints.


Laura hurriedly enters the bedroom and slams the door behind her. She looks around the room then walks to the window. Her shoes squelch on wet carpet.

She picks up a lamp from the bedside table and hurls it against the window. The lamps rebounds to the floor, the window unharmed. Smoke seeps through the door frame.

She picks up the lamp again and hits the window. It cracks. Small flames start to appear from under the doorway.

She hits the window with the lamp again and it smashes. The flames quickly seep through the door frame and start to pitch on the carpet. She breaks away the remaining glass and climbs through the window.

She looks at the grass below. There’s no sign of Richard.

The house is ablaze and the garden has some patches of fire and wreckage. She jumps.


Laura falls from the window and to the grass below. She lands feet first into a patch of flames. Her ankles crack and break. The petrol soaked into her daps alights and her feet are engulfed in flames.

Copyright © 2012 Danielle Louise Johns.
All Rights Reserved.


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